Oh, Alice
by LiGiKi
Summary: Alice plays a practical joke on Bella. One shotter! Please read and review! thankies :


**Hi! I hope you like this short story! This is a one shotter. Enjoy!**

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Bella's POV

I was alone in the woods. In the far distant I heard the sound of snapping twigs, a bear? My face scrunched up in frustration as I ran my eyes across the yellow tinted, tattered piece of creased parchment in my hands. The elegant coal black script wounded itself across the page forming letters. This step by step directions on how to get to the Cullen's house from my backyard was just infuriating. It was almost impossible to follow! I'm in the woods, not in a mall. I think Alice sometimes forgets that… Why would Alice do such a thing to me? Then again, she is Alice… I sighed as I crumpled the piece of paper and held it tight in my balled up fist. I trudged along the rustling leaves, loudly and stupidly marking my presence.

I turned left and kept on walking. The chirping of the birds high above in the canopy of the trees comforted me as I heard the trickling of water from a stream nearby. I didn't want to admit it, but I think I was lost. Every 360 degrees around me was just plain green from vegetation. It was like a little bubble…. With trees. I carefully stepped over a coiling vine, careful not to trip over it in my own clumsiness. There was barely no life around me. That was a good sign, I suppose. That means there would be nothing to be afraid of.

Suddenly, I heard a slight rustling behind me. I whirled around. There was nothing there. It was probably just the wind. I took another glance at the instructions. It said:

Go straight until you find the red willow tree

Turn left and go straight until you see the amaryllises.

Make a right and go straight until you see the marigolds.

Follow the creek upstream until you see the little dirt trail

Follow the trail

When you get to the end of the trail, you'll see a house.

You will be shocked

You will storm into the house and scream my name

I will explain later.

I shook my head. Was it necessary for Alice to give me instructions on what I will do later? Normal humans know how do to that… The last part confused me. Why would I be shocked? I kept on walking until I got to the little creek. The trickling of water misted water on my ankles and dripped down, soaking my socks. Obediently, I walked upstream and to my surprise, ten minutes later, I found a little dirt trail. Confident and proud, I followed it, beaming at myself for accomplishing this.

When the end of the trail came, I glanced at the house and all pride and confidence went down the toilet. I gaped with my mouth open in complete shock. Alice was right. I was shocked. Why? BecauseI was standing right next to my house!! My lips twitched downwards as I reread the directions furiously. Suddenly, I froze… Alice Cullen had just given me instructions on circling a miniscule portion of the woodlands around my house, back to my own house. I gritted my teeth and stridden towards my house and practically slammed the front door open. Thank God Charlie wasn't home.

"Alice!" I shrieked.

"Yes?" a small voice came from the living room.

"What kind of instructions is this?" I interrogated.

"Regular instructions," she announced, playing with me.

"I meant, where do these instructions lead to?"

"Exactly where you're standing!" Alice chirped.

I glowered at her beaming face of amusement.

"Why?" I said, sadly, giving in.

"Do you really think I'd give you instructions for wandering the woods alone? Edward would kill me if I did!" She said, half laughing and half serious.

"A-lice….." I groaned and rolled my eyes.

She gave me her best smile. I stuck my tongue out, half forgiving her. She grinned even wider and started bouncing up and down on the sofa.

"Wasn't that fun? Wasn't it? Wasn't it? Wasn't it?" Alice giggled bubbly.

Ugh. I hated it when Alice became all gushy like that. She reminded me of Jessica Stanley. The girl who loathed me ever since I did something idiotic during my depression. **(a/n: NEW MOON! Hee hee)**

"No," I sighed. Alice let out a high pitched laugh and she made her way to the door. "Woah, where are you going?" I inquired.

"I'm picking up Rosalie and Emmett from the mall! Edward is gonna pick you up in about 30 minutes. Okay?"

"Where's Edward right now?"

"He's helping out Carlisle at the hospital."

"O-okay. Bye, Alice. See you soon!"

Alice gave me a crooked smile. It was beautiful, of course, but not as quite as equivalent when my beloved Edward did it. She stepped outside and got in her yellow Porsche and drove off silently at top speeds down the road. I rolled my eyes. Alice was the last person I could think of (besides Rosalie) who would ever play a practical joke on me like that. I laughed to myself. I do admit it was quite entertaining.

Just like Alice had promised, Edward's shiny silver Volvo appeared on my driveway in half an hour. He opened the door for me and smiled my favorite crooked smile. I smiled back, gazing at his topaz eyes.

"How was your day?" Edward asked.

"Quite entertaining," I chirped, thinking of Alice.

We drove off hand in hand towards the Cullen's estate. Oh… I was soo gonna get back at Alice. I grinned happily. Oh, yes I will.

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**I hope you liked it! Please Review, review, review!! Alice sees in all of your futures that you are going to review and she is never wrong! or at least don't make her wrong. She'll feel bad and then cry then take you shopping and give you a whole new make-over!! -says "fun" sarcastically- haha lol. wel what are you waiting for? Review like you never reviewed before! (:**


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